An Update

I have left this journal, this blog, untouched for some time and I will take some time to hopefully explain why I have.

As I have stated, this journal was established as a place for me to post how God is moving in my life and the lessons I have learned from Him.

One thing that is a misconception of Christians is that we never suffer from questioning or trials. This is far from the truth. If anything, we are bombarded. The difference is that we have Christ to help us.

There have been times these past couple of months that my faith has suffered. Being unemployed and trying to figure out where the money to pay the bills is going to come from, plus moving, plus trying to repay an overpayment, I have questioned.

What type of God are You to do this to me and why do I serve You?

It is then answered to me when I read Jeremiah 29: 11 (NIV), which states, very simply this:

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

How comforting! I know that, while He hasn't planned where I'm at in my life, He is going to take this lump of coal and make a diamond. Yes, it will take time and struggle. I will have more times where I may ask God why. And He will answer me the way He did when Job struggled and questioned, according to Job 38:2 - 4 (NIV):

2 Who is this that darkens my counsel with words without knowledge? 3 Brace yourself like a man; I will question you and you shall answer me. 4 Where were you when I laid the earth's foundation? Tell me if you understand.

I don't understand and I wasn't there. God expects us to question. The real question is are we ready for the answer?

A Different Entry

So, I have neglected this journal for a couple or so weeks. Not much really to write about.

This journal started off as a way to talk about the way that God is moving in my life. He continues to move in my life. He is never as far away as we sometimes thinks He is.

Today was a tough day. Eleven years ago, I lost my daddy to colon cancer. I wasn't going to go to church, but decided it would be the best way to honour him. I cried a few times. One time was rather embarrassing. I had to actually get up and leave. The lady who came out and helped? I forgot her name. How embarrassing is that!

It has been a difficult day, but I've managed thru it.

This is short, but I had to write it.

An Exciting Life

So, I was leaving church on Sunday and sometimes I tend to think on my drive home. It's not a long drive, but it's long enough for me to think and to talk to God about what is going on in my life (or what isn't).

So, on Sunday, the sermon was about leadership skills that would be needed in the leadership role we are trying to fill at our church.

I'm not sure how my mind works at time, but what was said in the sermon got me thinking about my life.

I don't lead the most exciting life. At least as some people see it. I don't go out and party every night or week end. I don't use drugs. I don't have sex. I don't drink. I don't do the things that some people think make for an exciting life.

Nope. I'm a dull person, really.

I prefer staying home or doing some clean fun, like watching a movie or television. I enjoy spending time on my computer. I enjoy spending time with my cats and my best friend. A good time to me consists of my best friend coming over and watching CRIMINAL MINDS with me.

But, my life is exciting!

Every morning, I wake up excited about what blessings God is going to bestow upon me for that day!

It's exciting to think that what I'm going thru is going to bless someone else!

I may not have the so called excitement of others, but I have an exciting life nonetheless!

Unconditional?

We hear a lot about "unconditional love", but what is it? Simple. It's love without conditions.

We humans are very conditional with our love. We love people only if they fit into what conditions we set forth.

We often say that "I'll love you only if you fit into this mold that I have made just for you."

What would we humans do if God said that to us? If God said "I'll love you only if you fit into this mold I have made for you."

God loves us unconditionally. While He doesn't always agree with choices we make, He still loves us regardless.

I know that, in comparasion to some of my other entries, that this one is short. But, I'm so tired of people saying that they love others without condition and yet they put conditions on the love they set out for others.

Even though I tend to love without condition, I know that there are times that I put conditions to certain people when it comes to loving them. We all do.

But, don't we think that we should love with know conditions, no boundaries, like God?

Because He Lives

I had to head to the church to get four glasses that I had accidently left at there after yesterday's tea party. I'm a little low on gas, due to tea party errands that HAD to be run so my table would be beautiful (based on the theme of BEAU - TEA).

I didn't go to church this morning because my aunt had spent the weekend with me and, even though we were planning on going, she didn't feel so well and I chose not to go, but I still had to go pick up the glasses.

If you have read my blog so far, you'll know that I'm not in the brightest of places. I'm in a dark scary spot and sometimes find myself wondering where God is, even though I know He's right here, right next to me.

So, anyhow, I have our local Christian radio station on and they're playing some of the hymns that I grew up on and I find myself singing. Just be thankful that you didn't hear it. I sometimes wonder if I'm singing from my heart how God can make it beautiful when you have a singing voice like mine. I make even the worst of the worst singers on "American Idol" sound good.

Admist the "How Great Thou Art"s and the "Blessed Be The Name Of The Lord"s was "Because He Lives".

As I sang along, I felt tears form.

Because He lives, I can face tomorrow.
Because He lives, All fear is gone.
Because I know He holds the future,
And life is worth the living just because He lives.

How beautiful! What wonderful beautiful words!

To be able to face the fears of an uncertain future because Christ died and rose from the grave!

There is no way I can go thru what I am if I didn't have Christ.

And, no matter what is thrown my way, I'll hold onto the comfort that I know He holds the future and He only has my best interest at His Heart!

Why So Unexcited?

I was speaking with a very dear friend today. During our conversation, it turned to our excitement of what lies in Heaven for us when we finally make it home. I was in tears, excited over being in the presence of God, my Heavenly Father and Creator. To be with the One who loved me so muh that He sent Christ to die on MY BEHALF!

I am excited to see those that have gone before. I have this belief that we will know everyone when we get there. I am excited to think that Stephen and Samuel, Peter and Paul, Elijah and Elisha will run up to me and pull me into a hug, saying "We've been waiting for you! Welcome home!"

How come Christians aren't excited like that? Why? Isn't the thought of being with God for all eternity exciting?

Do we have something more exciting in life than that?

If so, what could it be? What do we have in life that is more important and more exciting than spending eternity with God?

I don't have anything that is so much more exciting in life.

Think about it.

A short life here with excitements that last a moment or an eternity with God?

I choose the excitement of an eternity with God.

Spiritual Warfare Or Real Life Pain

So, I'm sitting here, in my living room, listening to NeedToBreathe's LAY 'EM DOWN...another song quickly rising to the top of my favorite songs list. The song has the old time feel to it. Kind of like the song in O Brother, Where Art There when the one guy gets baptized.

While I love the song, I have issue with this lyric:

Make good on a promise To never hurt again

Let me explain why.

It makes it sound like that, when you give your life to Christ, you'll never again hurt. The exact opposite is true. Sometimes I feel like I hurt more because of my relationship with Christ. It is because there is a war going on for my soul.

The author of Ephesians tells us this in chapter 6, verse 12:

For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

I figure that if I'm hurting, it's because my soul is being fought over.

God doesn't promise that we'll stop hurting when we give our lives to Him. He only promises that He, and He alone, will fix what is hurting us.

In war, whether spiritual or physical, there is bound to be hurt. Someone, including ourself, will get hurt. I've been hurt more emotionally and mentally since I chose to walk with Christ.

The difference is that I can turn to Him to make me "all better".

We will hurt even as Christians. We will look at the unfairness of the world and wonder why we must suffer while the wicked succeed. We will find oursleves in situations that we wouldn't wish on our worst enemy.

Job lost everything. Paul and Silas were imprisoned. Christ Himself was crucified.

We are given the promise that God will heal our hurts.

But, we are also given this promise in Luke 10:19

Behold, I give unto you the power to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy; and nothing shall by any means hurt you.

Luke isn't talking about literallly walking on serpents or scorpions. It was a metaphor for demons. We have the power in Christ to overcome with Him on our side. We will, as long as we live, suffer physical and emotional pain. However, we can take joy in the fact that comfort is given to us thru Christ. He hurts when we do.

He feels our every pain: emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual.

However, our hurt and pain is covered by His Blood.

So, He will take our hurt and comfort us when we need Him most.

And so maybe we won't really hurt after all.